5 Things to Consider When Cohabitating

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Happy May Day, Monday, Law Day, end of Q1 or whatever you’re celebrating this week. Now that the year is a quarter of the way over, folks are graduating, moving to new places, and starting new lives. I was once here a few years ago. Keeping that spirit here, I want to discuss managing your finances with your significant other this week.

Regardless of your personal beliefs, many couples “cohabitate” nowadays. I do it. Maybe you do it. Let’s get uncomfortable and try to make the money conversation second nature.

Money is a sore subject for many when beginning a new lifestyle. Check out this stat from a recent study:

Money is a top cause of relationship stress. A study conducted by the American Institute of CPAs in 2021 gathered that 73% of couples living together said money is a leading cause of problems.

Dang. That’s a big number. What can be done about it?

Well, this can’t be eradicated entirely. Some debates about your finances are inevitable. I’ve developed a short list of things I would keep top of mind when beginning to combine your financial life with someone else. It seems to have worked for me so far.

1. Be Upfront

You like having a Starbucks coffee every day? They must have a Pilates membership. Cool. Be straight up about what is a want/need/lifestyle choice you are making. Better to know right away then creating a trust issue or spending on something that was not discussed previously.  

Also, create a tracker or budget app that lays it all out. Yours truly has linked an awesome tool at the end of this post for you to check out. And it’s FREE!

2. Have Shared Goals

This is the most important one here, in my opinion. What do you both want? Let your goals define how you spend and save. Let your aspirations, goals, and dreams trickle down into your daily habits. Creating shared achievements is something to cherish and gets rid of the whole “me vs you” thing. You’re in it together after all.

3. Understand and respect the other’s spending habits. (Within Reason)

If your partner is crazy in debt and has spending issues, yeah that’s a problem and should be looked at and discussed. But if your partner likes to watch Netflix or get lunch every now and then you should probably chill because that’s normal. Respect your partner’s spending choices if it’s not putting you in debt, ya feel? Not that hard. What a concept.

4. There’s more to relationships than money.

Money can’t buy happiness. Just ask Bill Gates or Jeff Bezos. I’m not well versed in billionaire divorce lore but even that amount couldn’t keep two people together. Keep in mind that you likely chose this person because they are fun to be around and live with, not because you plan on fixing and flipping them for a profit. Nuff said there.

5. $h1t happens.

Now I know my relationship and you know yours. But looking at the broad American statistics, it looks like relationships come go for a lot of folks. Maybe you’re a hopeless romantic, I don’t know. If you’re uncertain about your future or having doubts, understand the monetary implications. That’s whole other discussion, but it’s good to keep in mind.

Easier said than done, I know. When it gets down to it, it’s not a money problem between people, it’s likely a communication problem. Be open and honest about the coin.

Nothing I said here is groundbreaking. It goes back to being intentional about ensuring we put ourselves in the best situations to succeed. Whatever that means to us.

Need some help getting started? Check out my Excel budget Template I’ve built that gives you TOTAL control of your financial lifestyle. It integrates perfectly with Tiller!

Stay frosty mis amigos,

Andrew

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